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I wonder if anyone women want sex coolidge take offense if I propose that when it comes to sex, males have an appetite for novelty. A bull, worn out from copulation, shows no interest in the cow he just had his way with. I remember interviewing one researcher who said that, in his experience, the Coolidge Effect in rams is nearly infinite. I came across the Coolidge effect when I was writing an article for Psychology Today about the differences between the sex lives of gay men and straight men. At the time, gay men, on average, had vastly more sexual partners so seemed more predisposed to the phenomenon.

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Sex and novelty

So you're not a "10" in every which way. But you're probably pretty spectacular in some way, and definitely good enough in most areas of life. If ever there were a time to stop beating yourself up for being human, it is now. Verified by Psychology Today. Sex at Dawn.

Male sexual problems

Posted May 02, Reviewed by Matt Huston. The problem with advice beginning with just is that it almost always turns out to be nonsense disguised as common sense.


Forget all that brainy mumbo-jumbo and just do this. Men today, often enough, are angry at their wives.

The coolidge effect

Couples stop having meaningful conversations. I strongly disagree—both with this statement of the problem and the supposed effects on the relationship. First, the problem. In fact, for most men in long-term sexually monogamous relationships, a steady decrease in libido has everything to do with biology and hormones and would be the same regardless of the particular woman in their lives. The sexually monogamous husband of the hottest woman on Earth will start to lose interest at a certain point.


You want an inconvenient truth? Try this one: human beings are clearly evolved for sex lives featuring multiple simultaneous sexual relationships. Men, especially, are deed by evolution to be attracted to sexual novelty and to gradually lose sexual attraction to the same partner in the absence of such novelty. The so-called Coolidge Effect is well demonstrated in social mammals of all sorts and is old news to anyone knowledgeable about reproductive biology. Boys will be boys, and men will be the way they are, despite the many ways our society tries to make them change.


Surely, you can think of an example or seven. No less an expert than Dr. There is in fact, an entire industry of therapists and writers insisting that:. Now, what about the effects on the relationship? Sexual desire fluctuates for each of us in accordance with many factors: seasons, work and financial pressures, pregnancy and child-care issues, the death or suffering of loved ones, overall physical health, age, etc.

To be sure, sex can be an important part of intimacy, but it is not the essence of intimacy itself.


In fact, high-libido sex can easily be an expression of the utter absence of true intimacy: the notorious one-night stand. Couples who do not understand this are unlikely to survive for long. In fact, couples might find themselves having the most meaningful conversations ever if they have the courage to talk openly about these fluctuations in desire. One of the most important hopes we have for our book coming July 2nd is to make it easier for couples to make their way across this difficult emotional terrain together, with a deeper, less judgmental understanding of where these inconvenient feelings come from and a more informed, emotionally mature approach to dealing with women want sex coolidge.

Christopher Ryan, Ph. Back Psychology Today.

Coolidge effect

Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Help. Back Magazine. You Are Good Enough So you're not a "10" in every which way. Subscribe Issue Archive.


Back Today. Christopher Ryan Ph. About the Author.


Read Next. On "Falling in Love" vs "Loving". Is Monogamy Really the Key to Happiness? Have We Reached the End of Sex? Dueling Libidos.

My top ten list of the most amazing and possibly even true scientific phenomena that blow my mind, continued: the coolidge effect

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